14 Vintage Home Security Systems from the ’80s That Would Shock Modern Homeowners
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Home security was a completely different ball game back in the 1980s. Modern day homeowners are likely to picture a futuristic, high tech, automated world of security cameras, smartphone alerts, and facial recognition, but the ’80s were based on chunky devices, mysterious blinking lights, and lots of guesswork. Then, security was more about smart tech, DIY solutions, and hoping that flashing red light would send a burglar running.
It’s a fascinating thing, and a bit funny, to consider that these devices were once the pinnacle of home protection. They’re relics of a bygone era, clunky, sometimes a little over the top, but definitely a lot less ‘hands on’ than today’s sleek systems. So let’s go back in time and take a peek at some of the most bizarre security gadgets of the 1980s.
The Door Club Lock
The door club lock was a long metal bar that attached to a door from the inside and would be impossible to break in without lots of attention. It was a reassuring solid hunk of metal. The door club lock was a bit clunky, not discreet, but comforting to people who liked steel over tech as a barrier.
The Window Pin Lock
A window pin lock was simply a piece of metal that would slide into place to stop windows from opening all the way. Many homes used them to keep burglars out. In the day of neon windbreakers and Walkmans, this DIY fix wasn’t as sophisticated as today’s smart locks, but it was a favorite.
Motion Activated Floodlight
Motion activated floodlight was a game changer for anyone who didn’t mind an occasional startle. If someone wandered into the yard, the light would come on, and if you happened to be in the vicinity, both of you would be startled. Simple, but wildly effective, these lights are still used today, with improved sensors and energy efficiency.
The Wood Sliding Doors Block
You could wedge a piece of wood in the track so the sliding glass doors wouldn’t open. This wasn’t fancy installation or a user manual: it only required a sturdy block or broomstick. This was all that many families needed and was a simple, inexpensive solution.
The Dummy Camera
Real CCTV cameras in most homes were a rarity and expensive in the ’80s. Thus, many homeowners elected for dummy cameras, cheap plastic copies that don’t record anything. They even had blinking red lights so they would look more convincing. The idea was that if an intruder were to try and see if the camera was real, they wouldn’t want to try. It’s a bit like bluffing in poker: sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn’t.
The Old-Fashioned Whistle
Many homeowners had these little devices at their bedside or front door, and if they heard anything suspicious, they blew. You can even make the sound of whistle piercing enough to draw neighbors’ attention and scare off possible burglars.
The Yard Stake Alarm System
The yard stake alarm was a security measure where you would usually put a yard stake alarm in the ground, in front of windows, or around flower beds. An ear piercing siren would go off if someone stepped too close, startling both intruders and homeowners. It was an incredibly good scene creator, but it would also go off if an animal or an unsuspecting visitor would trigger it.
Contact Paper Curtain Trick
This was a clever one. Homeowners would put tinted contact paper on their windows so that people outside couldn’t see what was inside. Even if the house was empty, it made it look like there might be someone back behind the glass. It wasn’t high tech, but it was fast and cheap — and it would keep prying eyes away.
The Simple Latch Chain Lock
Ah, the trusty latch chain. Not fancy but it gave an extra layer of security when you answer the door. It wouldn’t stop a determined intruder, but it did make many feel a little bit safer. Even today you can find these on doors, a reminder of simpler times.
The Fake TV Light Simulator
Imagine this: a light bulb in a small box that would flicker in your window to make it look like a TV set. It was meant to trick burglars into believing that some one was home watching their evening sitcom. The simulators didn’t play anything; they just lit up colored lights, flashing in some sort of television pattern. This little gadget was a top seller for the security conscious ’80s homeowner, it’s silly but it was.
The Key Under the Mat
Ah, the classic. Back in the ’80s, putting your key under the welcome mat or a fake rock by the door was a good security move. Of course, burglars knew to look here, but many people still used this method. This one will crack up modern day homeowners, but for a surprising number of people it was just normal.
The Personalized Alarm Button
The personalized alarm button — which, for the truly dedicated was usually a clunky, handheld remote that could trigger the home’s alarm system from inside. It was a peace of mind button, a panic button of the 1980s variety: Push a button. It wasn’t the most subtle device, but it was nice to know you had an extra layer of control.
The “Beware of Dog” Sign
The classic ‘Beware of Dog’ sign, if you will, was a sure fire way to say ‘Stay Away’ and most times, there weren’t any dogs around, just garden gnomes, or maybe a small overly friendly terrier. Homeowners would slap these signs onto gates and fences to make it seem as if the owner had a ferocious guard dog waiting to pounce. The only barking was from a neighbor’s yard, but the less discerning intruder might’ve turned around on this sign.
The Alarm Sticker Without the Alarm
Another crowd favorite: Stickers for an alarm system with no system to back them up. The stickers were placed on the windows of homeowners, hoping to deceive anyone glancing in. The stickers, often called “SecureCo,” or “Sentinel,” were cheap stickers that cost very little but gave the impression of protection and none of the expense of real equipment. Back then it was a popular choice and today it may sound like a risky gamble.
Disclaimer: This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.
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